"The Book"

[Tim]

This is a short piece of fiction that I submitted to the people at http://www.365Tomorrows.com. It deals with the Bible, and my original intention was to paint the Bible in a critical light, so I worried after submitting it that they wouldn't touch it, fearing controversy. But it drew an interesting reaction from the forum community at 365t's. Most of them read it as very neutral, some even thought I was promoting the Bible. I'll let you all read it however you like.
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Judith switched her headlights on and checked the rearview. Deep brown hair slid around her shoulder as she turned to the right, looking down the street as the floating panel above the intersection flipped green.

She touched a few small switches in her console. Her chair reclined back while the car moved on in electric silence, making its own judgments about where to turn, and how fast to travel. A screen lit up, and a man’s face appeared.

“How may I assist you Miss Amateau?”

“I just need the weather – oh, and some business news.”

“Very good… It is currently 10 degrees Celsius outside your vehicle, and 9 degrees Celsius at your destination. Overcast skies – “

She interrupted: “That’s fine N-Fo. So, how’s business?”

“In business news, the hottest player on the market, BOOKCORP, has seen its most impressive rise in two weeks. They closed out the weekend up 35.9876 AC –“

She interrupted him again. “Ah, forget it. Just give me some television.”

The face melted back into the screen, replaced by a running advertisement. “…and this book just changed my life completely, I can say without doubt that I am a new man. I recommended it to all my friends and they –“

She heaved a sigh, flipping another switch and the cockpit returned to silence. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. The Book was inescapable these days. Arcturus was alive with this new phenomenon. It was possibly the biggest pop-culture item of the generation, and Judith was a bit exasperated. She had read it, and aside from being a complete bore to read, it was also full of subtle contradictions.

What was worse, she couldn’t go anywhere these days without some jumped-up Book advocate following her down the street trying to get her to “open her eyes to the light of Jesus.”

Yesterday a little boy had come to her door and asked her politely if she would read his favorite book. She had leaned down with an indulging smile and asked which book it was. When he produced a plain black copy of the Book, her smile froze into an icy grimace, and she shot an ironic glare at his mother who was waiting in the street.

Judith remembered clearly how the book had surfaced. Some astronaut had brought it back with him on a routine terraforming excursion to Earth. On returning to Arcturus, he had brought it to a publishing agency attempting to have them publish his “new novel.” When they discovered the origin, the government had confiscated it and auctioned it with many of the other artifacts that returned from Earth with the terraformers.

The market for Earth artifacts was voracious and exclusive. Lane Channer, chairman for one of the planets largest publishing (now the largest publishing) agencies, Book Corp, had bought it, read it, and understood its true potential as marketable fiction. He never foresaw the reaction that would result. Long story short, he published it, everyone read it, and it changed enough lives to attract the largest fiction based cult following in Arcturus’ history.

Judith settled more snuggly into her seat -- it sensed her restlessness, and slowly conformed to her body, smoothly gliding itself around her into a soft, artificial embrace.

She didn’t notice the new structure that was going up near her street as the vehicle rounded a corner, windows dimming as the red sun rose very slowly over the horizon. Tomorrow she would scoff at the obnoxiously tall wooden cross that was being skewered into the ground in front a humble building with a sign reading “Book Study beginning soon! Invite your Friends!”

[Ben]

Well, you said you wanted criticisms... so here goes.

I wanted more. It seemed like the very beginning of a story. I've noticed your blogs on silouf have got longer and more in depth, and it seems your writing has got more in depth, but not proportionally longer. So if you have any more to this story, post it!

P.S. Isn't boor spelt bore?

[Tim]

P.S. Isn't boor spelt bore?

Haha, right you are!

Yeah, I suppose the 600 word limit on 365t's submissions is a bit hampering, I'm just not sure where else I could go with the story, though. Maybe Judith converts haha!

[Ben]

Yeah, I suppose the 600 word limit on 365t's submissions is a bit hampering, I'm just not sure where else I could go with the story, though. Maybe Judith converts haha!

Oh, had no idea there was a word limit. However it does seem to me to be at least short story material... so it may go over the head of 365ts. Where to go with the story... I have no idea, lol. I just know that I wanted to read more. Sorry for the complete lack of advice there.

[Tim]

Sorry for the complete lack of advice there.

What?? No! It was helpful.

I generally engineer the stories for that website to terminate themselves within the word limit. Basically the whole storyline should exhaust itself within that frame, but still remain interesting and comprehensive. As you have found here, it doesn't always work out that well, and there are generally two alternatives: sacrifice a little plot, or compress the whole story to make it fit. I guess this is one of the later occasions.

Hmm, maybe I'll write a follow up "tomorrow" about this story...

[Ben]

Hmm, maybe I'll write a follow up "tomorrow" about this story...

Would that be a first for the site? Is it allowed? If it is, you could write a story that would take a year to read

[Tim]

Oh yeah, I'm sure it's allowed insofar as you can submit anything you want within the word limit. I'm not sure if a follow-up has ever been published on the front page of the site, but there is a separate forum for follow-ups written by fans of the fiction.

I could definitely write a second story and submit it, see what happens.

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